Friendship Update

Today I re-read the last blog that I posted and I thought that you all really needed an update.

At the last point, I had just sent the letter to my friend with the hope that she would be able to fogive me for what I now consider almost the unforgivable. I hoped that she would be able to see past the actions that I had started and remember the way it felt when we were in each other companys. Who knew, maybe I was hoping that I could even be a saviour to her disintergrating world.

It was not long after that I got the first of many awkard replies over the next couple of months. To begin with it was an email, that stated that there was no way we could resume the friendship, in fact I knew deep down that if she ever spoke another civil word to me again I should just be grateful. I was scared about getting this reply, could I reply back and more importantly should I reply back. I was scared that she would just delete the email, never having read it and whether it was suppose to absolve me or apologise wholeheartedly, then I would need to really think about what I wanted to say.

The first face to face meeting was scary for me. How would she react and what would we really say to each other? Would there be anything left of the person that I knew back then or would another more resentful person be in her place? To be honest, I didn't really know what to say, how could I resume a normal conversation with a person that I knew that I had let down so badly. Best friend material - at this moment I knew that I wasn't and who knew if I ever would be again.

It was more than awkard. It was down right uncomfortable, not just for me but for all the people who happened to be in the vicinity and although they may not have know the true extent of what happened they knew that something had and that the two people who they knew to be insepertable were now no longer. It good me thinking not long after this, how

You never know, when I wrote that last post we were barely talking, now we call and chat occasionally as well as sharing a drink when we see each other. This time next year, we could almost be back to where we were, well I can only hope.